Honey Bucket //
Burger Records/Gnar Tapes
Recommended Track: Brian Eno Song
The best thing about Honey Bucket is their drummer, and the worst thing about Honey Bucket is their name, which I’m pretty sure is a euphemism for a portable restroom or outhouse. I’ll give them this, though: They’re a lot better than an outdoor shitter, although I wouldn’t quite elevate them to the status of one of those Japanese numbers with the bidets.
Unfortunately for them, I think that their cover of Brian Eno’s “Burning Airlines Give You So Much More” is the best song on the album. The rest of the album is pretty much Strange Boys cuddling Black Lips. We’re going to reach a singularity pretty soon if this doesn’t fucking stop. Nothing hurts me more than a just decent band. If you’re not pushing forward, some way, somehow, you’re just creating a festering musical oxbow lake, where okay bands can get together and sound alike and be decent together. No great emotion is felt, and the jobs everyone will get post-music at various retail and fast food franchises will not be cool melancholy, like a 90s movie, but only shitty melancholy, like your boring middle-class adolescence.
Now that I’ve reached my quota for being a total douche to struggling artists, I’d like to bring up the fact that “Dumpster Dive” is a pretty good song. It reminds me of the times I’ve dumpster dived in the back of Trader Joe’s, before I found out about EBT. And, of course, the Black Lips song by the same goddamn name. Honey Bucket should listen to some Aleutian Throat singing, then have a frenzied orgy on Brian Eno’s front porch. Because Art.